Black Swan

It's been called riveting, brazen, ridiculous, magnificent, spellbinding, and unsettling. Critics have stated it's unique, it's human, that it's the world at its worst, and the world at its best. With 2010 being the year of remakes, sequels, and threequels, Black Swan was a seductive breath of fresh air and has brought on new excitement for what 2011 has in store for the entertainment industry. Natalie Portman most definitely deserves all the acclaim that her performance has been receiving! Her transitions between the fragile Swan Princess to the seductively dangerous Black Swan were so flawless that if you were not paying close attention then you were sure to miss it. A performance that is truly Academy-Award worthy, Portman transforms from a shy, inhibited, uncertain performer striving for perfection, into someone so passionately compelled to dance it drives her mad. And she does so with hardly a raise to her voice. Black Swan is a compelling piece of pure cinema and Portman delivers more than anyone could've asked with a near impossible role. She paints a wonderfully tragic picture of the hero and villain that live inside all of us. We come to care for an impenetrable heroine without ever coming close to understanding her, or why. It gets under your skin and inside your mind. Black Swan is a must see for 2010!

Stage #5: Acceptance

You don't want to talk about it, not always, but you also don't want to be alone. My granny passed away a month ago today. It's not hard to talk about it, but sometimes I don't want to. I want to be around people who know what I'm feeling without me having to say it. I don't know how others deal with grief, but I think I'm in the acceptance stage. I just don't want to come to that conclusion alone. I don't doubt that it will get better, but when it doesn't feel that way what I have found most comforting is being in the company of someone who is doubting things as much as I am. I never wanted to do it alone.

December 2, 2010 - January 2, 2011

It's only been a month. And when you put it that way, it doesn't sound like it's really been long at all, but it feels like it's been an eternity. I spent the afternoon with my dad and my aunt because I wanted to be with people who were there when the month started. I'd be lying if I said it felt different, after a month having gone by, but it doesn't. I didn't know what I was supposed to feel then and I don't know now. Maybe after two months I will have better clarity.

Eleven for 2011

1. Love deeper
2. Laugh harder
3. Speak more encouragingly
4. Listen well
5. Forgive quickly
6. Anger slowly
7. Dream bigger
8. Hope stronger
9. Believe fiercely
10. Trust faster
11. Risk everything

Eyes Wide Open

They say that love is blind, but I disagree, at least when it comes to real love I do. Christ didn't come with a message of blind love. He did not ignore the faults or mistakes of those He spent His time with, in fact those were often the things that He addressed first. 


This past year has had numerous challenges, and within each challenge has been an invaluable lesson. The lesson that I have come to appreciate most is loving someone with my eyes wide open. It's one thing to love someone without ever really knowing them, it's quite different to love someone knowing all of who they are. It's something that God can do in a matter of minutes, He can see all of who you are and love you anyway. We are not God, and He knows that, that's why He has designed it that we learn to love all of someone in small doses. The durations of the journeys are significantly different, but the desired end result is the same.


"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." -John 13:34-35


I would never wish that anyone love another blindly. There is nothing more rewarding or powerful then being able to say that your actions come from a pure, wide-eyed love and you didn't need another reason. Christ hung on the cross because His love for us was that immense and His eyes weren't closed to the depths to which we are capable of falling. If I want to emulate anything from Christ, I want that to be it.