Relationship Detox

If you think it's difficult having someone in your life one day and then waking up the next to find them gone, you're right. That is difficult. Want to know what's worse? (and yes, something worse is possible.) Whats worse is having that person walk back into your life, but walking back in half way.


It's very hard to unlearn a habit, or your role in a relationship even after the dynamics have changed. I've never done well with half-hearted commitements, I won't make them and I don't want them made to me. There's absolutely no comfort in the certainty of being able to count on someone half way. But when your heart is so use to doing things a certain way, trying to teach it new tricks is an exhausting chore.


It's as if you go through withdrawals. Life dangles the "drug" right in front of your face but just beyond your reach because you have to learn to live without it so you can live in a world where it exists. It's cruel, but it makes sense. It's sucks, but some part of me thinks, believes it's worth it or else I wouldn't have checked myself in to this "rehab".


See you on the other side. Now back to my padded room with purple crayons.